Thursday, April 30, 2009

Refocus

I've been very prayerfully seeking direction about our family planning.  My Catholic faith believes that you should not avoid pregnancy unless you are financially or emotionally incapable of adding to your family.  Our marriage vows included a promise to accept children willingly and lovingly from God, and while some may believe that they've accepted their 2.5 children lovingly, I'm a bit convicted about the idea of having more children.  On one hand, I'm blessed with super strength fertility (seriously, if it were a qualifying trait of superheroines, I'd have my own comic series), my pregnancies have been flawless (unless you count gaining way too much weight with my second), and my babies have been healthy.  On the other hand, I am constantly behind on laundry, more often than not it looks like a toy box exploded in my living room, and my children are a bit on the unruly side.  Obviously the emotional capability is in question! 

In the midst of my prayer and reflection, it dawned on me (ok, fine.  He hit me over the head with it) that my lazy tendencies, inconsistent organization, and lack of firm discipline are NOT reasons to avoid more babies!  I plan to spend the next two or three months weaning off my one child lifestyle that I've been naive enough to think I could keep with three running around.  My firm discipline is already evident in my son, though we have far to go.  The next step will be to simplify my life in order to make time to create the haven that I, as a mommy and wife, am obligated to create!  Once that it accomplished, I'm sure God will let me know what my next assignment is!

3 comments:

Holly Rutchik said...

Thanks so much for this honest post! I feel the same way. I tell myself that I am not emontinally able to have a lot of kids--put upon reflection and prayer--I know it really is just my lazy self--I COULD have the house together, clean more, love better--I just need to die to myself more in order to do this. Now, I just had 2 babies in a year--the youngest being 5 months. But, I am unable to breastfeed--so I have my fertility back. I know that right now, I am called to space. It really would be too much, too soon. But, 6 months from now----? I love being Catholic--to figure things out on my own is too much----thank goodness I have my faith and my God to lead me!
Anyway--point of this comment is that you are spot on here--and bless you for sharing it with the world. I think it is a lesson we all need to be reminded of.

Chrissy said...

I share this view with you, and I'm baptist! ;o)

StumblingServant said...

I haven't responded to your question yet! I don't know of any specifics, but I do know that Blessed Gianna gave her life (literally) for her child. She may be a good saint to ask to pray for your situation! :D I'll keep asking around for more.